Just A Lil Mo'

There were times throughout the last couple of years that I seemingly had what I thought was a rough patch. Everything that I wanted didn’t turn out how I wanted it — from school, not being able to concentrate or focus on getting through the semester with a passing grade to being unhappy on almost every job that I worked. I didn’t get it; nothing was falling in place. I even had writer’s block for what felt like months. My creative juices weren’t flowing, and I had just mentally checked out.

This “rough patch” gladly made it’s way over into my personal life. My anxiety was always on ten, and it felt like I was having multiple episodes throughout my day. Having these numerous episodes sometimes left me upset and even depressed. All I kept asking was, “How did I get here?”
Love was even off the radar as well. All I could hear was God saying, “Aht Aht,” and I just ignored him. Red flags and all I was just out here wilding.

Needless to say, this left me in a very dark space. I wasn’t sure how or if I would recover from this. Even though I have always stood firm in my faith, I felt this wasn’t connected to my spiritual side. This black space I was in was 100% about me! It was about me digging deep within me to get something out that would take more than prayer.

After talking to my best friend, she planted a few seeds, the power of the tongue, manifestation, and daily positive affirmations. I knew that all three of these would take a substantial attempt of self-motivation and lawd I didn’t have it in me at this time. But, here goes nothing. So I burned my sage, mediated daily, got on my knees until they ached, and made sure to say my affirmations until tears spewed from my eyes. I spoke positivity and greatness over myself and made sure the power I held within my tongue was nothing but GREATNESS and ROYALTY.

Slowly but surely, things began to turn around. Job offers from every angle, people that I prayed and asked God to remove slowly vanishing, I was even waking up in better spirits. Not to mention everything that I spoke or positively spoke about came to the past. School was going great, I was on the Dean’s list every quarter, and nothing seemed to spark my anxiety. I was thoroughly excited, I was coming out of a dark space, and everything was looking up even my personal life. See, that was the most challenging area because I always seem to ignore those red flags. But this time around, instead of just cutting people off and kicking them to the curb, I manifested exactly what I wanted in my next mate.

I spoke of things that I deserved and how I wanted to be loved and respected. I meditated and aligned my energy until it became second nature. My lifestyle changed, and I felt better and better every day. I was thankful and humbled. My connection was deepened enough that I could make changes all across the board. Talk about being proud of yourself.

I now understand how I was failing myself before. Allowing others to dwell in my space rent-free, take over my energy, and, most importantly, prevent me from being the best me I could be!
Well, now, I realize the power that I have is within myself, and I no longer give anyone the ability to steal my peace or state of mind.

I did this, and I manifested my life and turned it around. It was deeper than prayer; it was more profound than cutting people off or just ghosting them, and for all of this, I’m forever grateful.

The best is yet to come because I manifested my future!